Last week was a hard one. What am I saying?…. This whole month was exhausting. Our daughter prepared for us a special autumn menu that consisted in 3 weeks of coughing, sleepless nights, followed by a very special week that started with high fever, diarrhea, runny nose and more coughing, conjunctivitis and when we thought we finally got over the worst, she woke up crying Friday night accusing pain in her ear. I wanted to scream: “Really? Now what, we have to deal with otitis too? When will this be over?” Well, is over now… fortunately, she is ok, but sadly for me, I got sick too. It had to happen sooner or later! 🙂
Over the years, I have come to understand that a parent’s life is beautiful, but also challenging, unpredictable and so goddamn frustrating sometimes. I have been building up so much frustration over this past month, that I was getting really nervous every time I was hearing her coughing hard and crying because she couldn’t catch her breath. The feeling of helplessness and the failure of the numerous treatments we tried this month made me cry of frustration and nerves. We tried everything we could and there was nothing more to do but wait for her body to fight the virus on her own. Now, you don’t tell a tired mom to just wait! “I don’t want to wait anymore, I want this to be over now!” 🙂 This is what my inner voice screamed for days. I felt like a volcano ready to burst at any time, until one day, when I gave up. Instead of bursting outside, I burst inside. My mind finally admitted that there’s was nothing more to do, that we were lucky we weren’t dealing with anything worse, that I had to calm down and be patient, that I had to have faith and pray. My heart new I have done everything I could and having faith was the only thing left to do.
So, how to fight “parenting frustrations”? I’m not sure you can. You know there will be situations when not being in control of what’s happening, not finding a solution, especially when it comes to your child, will get you frustrated. So, don’t fight it, embrace it, admit it, assume it and get used to it. Parenting is just a training camp for life, it will push your limits, teach you some lessons, will force you to find solutions, or just the opposite, admit your defeat. 🙂 I don’t know how, but the moment I admitted all my frustrations out loud, I understood that they were normal but also that I had already done all I could do. And that changed everything…
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